It's not just a line from "Trani", it was Thomas Ravenel's campaign slogan (looking back, we should have seen this coming). Anyway, that's what he pledged to give the good people of South Carolina when he ran as our Treasurer. And he lived up to his promise. Unfortunately, making sure no kid is left behind without an 8 ball is somewhat illegal. Thomas Ravenel is now in a world of trouble that not even a nude dip in his jacuzzi will fix. Hey, I know! Maybe some cocaine will make it all better! Oh . . . right. Forgot. Anyway, TR needs your help. So if you were on the other end of one of his keys, do the right thing and write the guy a note telling him you're there for him, man. Well, not there in prison for him. Or there with cash to pay his fine, man. But there with him when he gets out and doesn't have to do any more community service. And when no one else will see the two of you together. So pretty much you'll call him later. But you're there for him, man.

Seriously, though, how could we ever trust a Treasurer who would give away cocaine? You're supposed to be good with money, TR. At least sell the stuff. Ah, rumor has it people will pay good money for it.

Another side note, I went to Doolittle's yesterday to buy my dog some raw meat, and since I spent two month's salary on her food, they gave me one of their bumber stickers. It couldn't have been more timely . . . or more appropriate for TR's new campaign. It simply reads:

Been There. Sniffed That.

All you'd need to add is Ravenel '08.

And maybe pretend this letter never happened.

Or this one.

And maybe ignore all the free press.

All the free press.

Whooooaaaa!