Breaking News: Pitchfork Loves Liars. An excerpt, because their reviews are way too fucking long: But my favorite detail of this feel-good story-- popular Brooklyn post-punk band falls out of favor by changing directions and ultimately produces an album that eclipses its debut-- is that Liars are still waltzing along on their own terms. This, their third LP, shows zero concessions to the criticisms they received from publications like Spin and Rolling Stone, who awarded They Were Wrong their lowest possible marks. Succeeding rather than regressing or retreating, Liars have had the last laugh: Drum's Not Dead is a majestic victory lap, and on all levels, a total fucking triumph. Buy it cuz they said so.

Pitchfork Also Loves Those Word-of-the-Day Calendars. And I'm guessing the word on their office's calendar on Monday was 'Labyrinthine'. Here's hoping the word on Friday is 'Renal Failure'. I'd really like to see the guys work that one into their verse.

Today (from the Liars review) 1st paragraph: The acoustically rich radio facility in the former East Germany boasts a labyrinthine system of rooms, each with its own distinct acoustic advantages. - Brandon Stosuy

Monday (from the Destroyer review) 1st paragraph: It wasn't until I actually sat down and gave Destroyer's Rubies a few good listens that the aptness of such a rumor really hit me: The album is structurally complex, thematically dense, and labyrinthine in its self-referentiality. - Matt Lemay

Best Buy. Late Story. The mega-chain was offering many of your Indie faves for the hobo-friendly price of $7.99. They cut deals with record labels like Merge and Matador, something that incensed more than a few in the Indiestry. But it kind of excited me, because I've netted like $80/month for the past 8 months. But then I got to the end of this story about how we should support our local music stores and found out that the promotion over at Best Buy is over. Those bastards! Anyway, point of my story: Pitchfork coulda helped a brotha out by covering this during the promotion. Also, when at all possible, shop at Best Buy. It's a lovely experience. I mean, lonely.

No No No. No No No. EPSN is getting it all wrong yet again. First, they won't shut the fuck up about Barry Bonds. Is he retiring? Will he be in the Hall of Fame? Will he pass Hank Aaron? Will he distract his team? Will he endorse Proactive? Will he eat egg salad for lunch? TEnough! The only people who care live in California and Bristol. How do you not realize that? But, ESPN, that is not your biggest flub. No, that would have to be showing the Accenture Match Play Whatchamacallit all afternoon, pushing PTI out of the rotation. Don't you guys own like forty channels. How about pushing the golf to the Deuce or putting PTI over there? Yesterday you had coverage of some gripping poker on there. Again, Pardon The Interruption is your best show. Don't put it in the corner.

Chris Penn's Toxicology Report Suggests He May Have Been Moonlighting As a Pharmacist. I'm no expert, but I've been watching a lot of CSI and Criminal Intent and figure that's what Goren or that Albino would have speculated, then proven true with the help of a 14th century manuscript found near the scene and a stunning admission from Sean. Case closed.

WHNS: A Goldmine of Gold and Journalism and Stuff. What's the hottest story of the year after Cheney's facial? Two words. Well, really one. Let's call it one and a half: MySpace. Vanity Fair has a fascinating story that pretty much hits the nail on the head. And includes some quotes from the coolest cat in LA, Hobie Hasselhoff. Fortunately for us, WHNS is now on the tip:

My Space is exactly what the name says, a little corner of the world that's all yours. You can post your pictures, your friend's pictures, and even keep a sort of diary called a blog. All of it' s free and in full view for anyone to see. If you have ever watched it; it happens quick. We got approaches pretty fast by the predators. So we went to the mall to hear what kids think.

Although the food court was half empty it was full of My Space users and here's what they had to say about this website: "It' s addicting; I'm on it like all day all the time;" "Every day I check it at least 2 or 3 times a day;" "Addicting, very very addiciting;" "I think it' s a little outrageous; everyone in high school is on it."

A couple of things: Why the negativity? Why not see the food court as half-full? And if it's half-empty how can it be full of anything? Oh, WHNS, you always give us an unbiased, fair perspective on the Upstate. The other thing, and I think it's a bit funny, is that you say "If you've ever watched it; it happens quick. We got approaches pretty fast by predators." Okay, I use MySpace, granted it's to prey on preteens, but I'm in the minority, I imagine, and, anyway, I'm betting the 'fast approach' was by none other than Tom, one of the founders of MySpace. His picture turns up as a friend on your profile page whenever you open an account. It may be creepy, but it's not predatory. I digress, visit my profile (kellerskards) if you have small, soft hands. And just need a good friend who understands that your parents are sucky.

Part 2 of The WHNS MySpace Invasion: The guys over at Fox (WHNS) went a-lookin' for some people they found on MySpace in the Greenville area. They wanted to show how easily a perp could go online and track down innocent young girls, like Amber, a Hooters employee: She's only twenty but some of her pictures look very adult. She listed both of her jobs. One at a photography studio and another here at Hooter's. We went inside and asked . . . and had some delicious wings. Seriously, her job kinda hurts your story's credibility. Let me guess: the next innocent girl you found was working at Platinum Plus, no? Anyway, Amber, if you're out there, check out my profile and bring me my damn wings. I ordered them like 30 minutes ago. God, I could just kill somebody! But who? And where could I find an endless supply of people to murder?

Hobie's (from Baywatch) MySpace page: Hobie!

My page (must be atleast 12 to enter): Kellerskards!

South Dakota Residents Stocking Up on Coat Hangers. Did Dirty Dancing teach us nothing? Jerry Orbach is spinning in his grave.

American Idol Stealing Male Votes. For real, what was up with that Bobby character? And that 14 yr old? And Paula slurping every Joe with vocal chords? You kept true to yourself and that's what this competition is about.

The vote-stealing pics: She's got a great voice.

Did Koonce get a new job? Are they really paying fluffers that much these days? What is all this madness?