Well, I thought I'd been loved but I never had til I was wrapped in the arms of a Mississippi man. When he holds me close it feels almost like another hurricane just ripped the coast. If he can't come to me I'm gonna go to him . . . that Mississippi River, Lord, I'm gonna swim. - Loretta Lynn & Conway Twitty buy it for your F150!

Superdome Not Living Up To Its Name. What looked liked a bit of luck for the Crescent City on Monday morning has turned out to be anything but. The situation is unbelievable. Hundreds, possibly thousands, are thought to be dead. And that's just in the NO metro area. That doesn't take into consideration Mississippi, Alabama or Florida. Any way you look at it, it's terrible. And the water continues to rise. http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2005-08-31-astrodome_x.htm

Here He Comes To Save The Day! George W The President finally left Crawford to deal with the catastrophe. It seems like he could have been better prepared. Nothing could have stopped it, but certainly the response could have been better orchestrated. http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,167699,00.html

Show Me Your Looting Tits! As predicted, looting has been widespread. Many of the images we've seen, though, have been of people looting Wal-Mart. Come on, when you're gonna steal shit, steal some worthwhile shit. http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/nation/la-083005looters_wr,0,562628.story?coll=la-home-headlines

Understandable Targets of Looters:

Water
Food
Diapers
Medical Supplies

Not Cool At All to Loot:

Plasma TVs
DVDs
Cameras
Riding Mowers
Jewelry

Honestly, where the hell do you plan on pawning that shit? And if you keep it, where are you gonna plug it in? Your entire city is under water. Maybe your priorities should shift a tad. Just a tad, folks. Seriously, is it really necessary that you have the latest version of Halo right now? Up, up, down, down, left, right, left right, you've got 30 free men and zero surviving family members!

More Stupid Human Tricks. I usually side with the underdog, the whistleblower, the fly in the ointment, but Cindy Sheehan is a complete imbecile. I have my suspicions that she's working for the Bush administration. Her interview on NPR the other day was embarrassing, to say the least. If you missed it, it went something like this:

NPR: So your son volunteered for the army, right?
Cindy: You don't know what you're talking about. You're dumb! Does that justify my son's murder? Does that justify the killing of millions? I'm a hero. My son was cool. Unlike you.

NPR: Okay, so -
Cindy: I only have 2 minutes. Make that one minute and 57 seconds.

NPR: What have you heard from W Bush The President?
Cindy: I'm tired of talking about that. Like do you have anything original to ask?

NPR: Ah, well, how did the -
Cindy: Hello? Hello? I'm losing you.

-Click-

NPR: That was retarded . . . and I apologize for that.

A link to the interview (that may not work): http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=4822109

The Rocket Looking Very NASA-Like. Andy Roddick takes an early exit at the US Open. http://www.nydailynews.com/front/story/342132p-292072c.html

Martha No Longer Grounded. Martha Stewart, the newest star of a reality show that I can't wait to watch, is off house arrest. Her immediate plans include a trip to the Big Easy where she'll show the locals how to incorporate a stunning water feature into their flooded living rooms - using only some ribbon, a crack pipe and sea salt!http://money.cnn.com/2005/08/30/news/newsmakers/martha_release/

Chad Rucker's Lawyer Fist-Deep In Nuttin' But Thode! That's the end of the story, thank God.