In our world of reality, we cling to dreams as a form of hope. So this memoir of madness is actually the psychosis of being dope. - L'roneous Da Versifier

Where there's a handle that needs jiggling . . . Koran flushing at Guantanamo and the somewhat unsubstantiated Newsweek story that followed won't go away. The papers released to the ACLU don't confirm anything, technically, but it's good enough for me. So why isn't it good enough for government work, as they way? http://www.nytimes.com/2005/05/26/politics/26koran.html?th&emc=th

But Joey has such promise! NBC scrambling after it finishes 4th, just ahead of UPN, in network ratings. That's right, FOX, riding an OC/Super Bowl wave, passes them by, likely hanging their asses out of the window. http://www.nytimes.com/2005/05/26/arts/television/26rati.html?th&emc=th

Bo gets hosed. The only explanation is that he was just "too real". The "cats" out there certainly stood by his side. But, I mean, his 'real factor' was off the charts. As a result, he lost the critical just-an-average-schmo-who-can-only-recognize-keul-if-it's-conspicuous segment. Carrie, smelling blood, played it safe and walked away with a Marquis Jet Card and the real possibility of being manhandled by either Rascal or Flatts. http://www.elitestv.com/pub/2005/May/EEN42955860db994.html

Kristof creams the very jeans he planned to donate to the Darfur effort. For real, no need to pick up the Sunday Times Editorials. Kristof has already written his piece. It goes something like this: "This money for Darfur, raised by Canada, US and others is a start. But only a start. America, we can - and must - do more!" And so on and so forth. http://breakingnews.iol.ie/news/story.asp?j=144280278&p=y44z8x984

There's no cooters in baseball, either. Score that as an error in judgment. Coach drops trow to show team that it takes balls to play America's pastime. Why'd you look at second? Is that where you left your Kotex? The play was at first, Mister "Look at me! I got a vagina!" http://www.thecarolinachannel.com/sports/4534499/detail.html

I'll be forgotten in two years for 600, Alex. Ken Jennings, slipping into obscurity, finishes 2nd in the tournament of champions. In doing so, he won some more cash and secured a place for his name on the back of a Trivial Pursuit Genus 6 card. http://www.thecarolinachannel.com/entertainment/4533433/detail.html

Doggystyle. Unfortunately, without the consent of said dog. This happened in my backyard. Not literally my backyard, but close enough to hear the yelps. And if you're wondering, huffing gasoline and makin' a baby with your meth-addicted boyfriend of the hour will have no negative repercussions. http://www.whns.com/Global/story.asp?S=3388412

Rednecks playing a game they can't spell. Redneck Roulette is like Russian Roulette, but replace the mystique with some Mistys. That should do it. On a side note, chances are looking pretty good that one of thee guys fathered the aforementioned dog rapist. http://www.whns.com/Global/story.asp?S=3393611

The oolice should arrest the editor. The story is bad, but the writing and editing is worse. And check out the quotes they chose to use from the victim's classmate. Something about not expecting the guy to die yesterday. No, really, Ms. Cleo? http://www.whns.com/Global/story.asp?S=3382887

Roger, we hardly knew ye. And rightly so. Still, I thought depression was waking up with 40 bucks in your wallet and a condom hanging out of your bottom. Apparently, this studmuffin forgot about that incident. Or, even worse, he didn't! http://www.rogerhailes.com/poetryss4.html